The Behavior that Defines Gay and Lesbian People

Jeremy Hooper over at the blog G-A-Y (good as you) has a blog post that shows us that youth isn’t our only hope for the future of equality. An elderly woman calls into the Jan Mickelson radio show, Mickleson in the Morning on WHO out of Des Moines, IA, and admonishes political activist Bob Vander Plaats for making fun of and laughing about gay and lesbian people at a Republican Womens District Meeting (listen to the audio at Jeremy’s blog). Bravo for this fine lady for standing up for us, but what I really want to talk about is what host Jan says towards the end of the podcast.

Around 3:20 you can here Jan talk about the “lifestyle” of gay and lesbians being “way past snicker…absurd” and speaking about the “behavior” that defines gay and lesbian people. I’d like to clue Mr. Mickleson on just some of this behavior.

The behavior that defines gay and lesbian people is finding someone who they are attracted to, care about and with whom they can build a life. The behavior that defines gay and lesbian people are wanting to care for that person when they get sick; make medical decisions for them should they be unable to make them for themselves. The behavior that defines gay and lesbian people is starting an on-line resource for bullied youth to let them know it does get better; they are not worthless; there is hope and a life out there for them (and gays have been doing this type of missionary work long before the internet existed). The behavior that defines gays and lesbians is wanting to adopt children–children crated by a heterosexual union–who don’t have a loving, caring family; to show them that they are not worthless and that they are wanted and loved. The behavior that defines gay and lesbian people is going to court, marching, speaking to legislators, friends, family, strangers–for years–just to have the opportunity to get married. The behavior of gay and lesbian people is raisng $100,000 in 24 hours (and counting) for a homeless shelter that serves Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) youth, who are often rejected by their families and end up on the streets (and you better believe that we would raise that same kind of money for anyone if the need for an LGBT specific shelter didn’t exist). The behavior that defines gay and lesbian people far extends outside what we do with and to each other when we get behind closed doors and it is that behavior for which we are seeking recoginition of equality. You don’t have to approve of our sex practicies (I am sure there are a lot of sex practices that heterosexual couples do that you wouldn’t approve of either), but you do have to approve of all of those things that we do as a couple when we are not having sex; the behaviors listed above. These are things for which we are seeking recognition, approval and equality, becasue our relationships, as the title of Jeremy Hooper’s blog suggests, are as good as you.

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